Trust is the backbone of a healthy marriage. It’s right up there with communicating regularly and spending quality time together. When spouses are honest with one another, they create a sense of peace in the relationship. They can rely on one another without question.
When trust is broken, it’s difficult to get your relationship back to where it once was. Nobody wants to be in a relationship where there’s distrust. Feeling uncomfortable or paranoid about where your spouse is at all times is no way to live.
Whether you’re strengthening your marriage or trying to right a wrong, here’s how to save your marriage by building lasting trust with your spouse.
8 Tips That Will Help Save Your Marriage
1. Be Honest, Even When It’s Hard
It isn’t always easy to be honest, especially if you’ve done something wrong or if you know what you have to say is going to hurt your partner. But it’s important to be forthcoming when there’s a relationship issue.
Being honest about your thoughts and feelings will help you build a better relationship. It creates a pattern of trust that will show your partner that they can rely on you.
2. Show Forgiveness
Couples need to be able to forgive one another if they want their marriage to survive. Why? Because every couple, no matter how happy they are, will fall short at one point or another.
From small betrayals, like sharing a secret or not picking up milk when you said you would, to larger acts of disloyalty like cheating on your partner, there will always be a need for practicing forgiveness in a marriage.
Extending this kindness takes strength, especially if an act of betrayal has left you heartbroken. But, if you expect your partner to forgive you for the things you do to hurt them, you must give forgiveness in return.
3. Be Transparent
Are you stricter about protecting your phone from your spouse than you are about locking your front door at night?
The more you treat your phone like it is something to be protected, the more suspicious your spouse will be about what’s going on behind their backs. If you don’t want your spouse to snoop through your phone when you leave the room, you must be transparent.
Some couples choose to do this by exchanging passwords for social media, having an “open-door” policy about their smartphones, and being upfront about what’s going on in their life.
Remember, if you’re doing something you don’t want your spouse to know about, you probably shouldn’t be doing it.
In order to learn how to save your broken marriage, you must be willing to share your life with your spouse. Open up about what happened during your day. Relay funny stories, interesting conversations, or vent the frustrations of your daily interactions.
When couples share their days with one another, they inadvertently let their partner know where they’ve been and who they’ve been talking to. Letting your spouse in on these key aspects of your day helps build a bond of trust and draws partners closer together.
5. Apologize When You’re Wrong
Let’s face it: nobody likes to admit that they’re wrong.
But, in order to build a trusting relationship and save your marriage, you must be willing to apologize and admit defeat. Owning up to your mistakes is a respectable quality that is great for building trust. It shows your partner that you aren’t unreasonable during a discussion and makes them more likely to open up to you.
Admitting when you’re wrong and taking responsibility for it also evokes your partner’s respect. If they respect you, they’ll be more likely to hear you out during a heated discussion and consider your side of things.
Plus, it’s better for your health. Studies show that going to bed angry can actually train your brain to hold onto negative emotion longer than it would have, had you resolved your issues before going to sleep.
6. Set Boundaries
Have you had problems with trust in your marriage before? It may be that someone outside of the marriage has compromised your marital trust by way of an emotional or physical affair, or simply through flirtation. Some couples may not view flirtation as harmless, while others may view it as a gateway to dangerous behavior.
Build trust in your marriage by setting respectful boundaries with your partner. Make an agreement not to have secret conversations with someone who has expressed interest in you. Setting firm limits regarding potentially dangerous interactions can help prevent either spouse from being put in a compromising position.
7. Live Up to Your Word
One way you can boost trust in your marriage is by living up to your word. You can accomplish this in three simple steps.
- Come home when you say you will.
- Be where you say you will be.
- Never break promises.
By establishing a pattern of positive follow-through, you show your partner that you are worthy of their trust.
8. Spend Quality Time Together
To save your marriage, you need to spend quality time with your spouse on a regular basis. Many couples do this by making a strict ‘Tech-Free Hour’ in the home, where they put their smart devices aside and spend one hour talking to one another. This builds up a marital friendship and increases trust.
Others love to have a weekly date night, where they spend time having fun and romancing one another. Research studies regarding couples who regularly spend time together have revealed that couples who had a regular date night showed boosted trust, improved communication, and heightened sexual chemistry.
Trust is the most important aspect of how to save your marriage and to have a healthy relationship. Strive to work as a team, apologize when you’re in the wrong, and keep your promises to your spouse. The more you work at building trust, the happier your marriage will be.
About The Author: Sylvia Smith, Relationship Expert
Sylvia Smith is a relationship expert with years of experience in training and helping couples. She has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships. Her mission is to provide inspiration, support and empowerment to everyone on their journey to a great marriage. She is a featured writer for Marriage.com, a reliable resource to support healthy happy marriages.